My husband and I had been discussing having a threesome, which I agreed to on the condition that we would hire an escort to join us so I wouldn’t have to ask someone I know. Now, my question to you is if there’s any way to tell for sure that a sex worker doesn’t have an STD? Thank you.
Debby: Sorry, no, there’s not. Some sexually transmitted infections (STI) are not easily tested for — for example, we have no widely available testing (outside of research settings) for HPV in men or mycoplasma genitalium for people of any gender (yeah, I know - most people have never heard of m. genitalium but it’s a thing). Other STIs (like HIV) can hang out for a while before a person would test positive for them. If you’re concerned about STIs, either steer clear of bringing in an outside partner or only engage in sex acts that are less likely to transmit infections or use a condom, knowing that it would greatly reduce the risk of many but not all STIs. You might also want to read a book like Opening Up or The Ethical Slut to help you and your husband communicate and manage all the other things involved in opening up one’s monogamous relationship to include others.