Dear Hoosier sports fans and long-time readers of the JustIN Sports Report: as you are aware, concern from a small group of radical left-wing militia crazies has arisen regarding the development of JustIN Sports. However well-intentioned and awesome it was, I am writing to inform you that the JustIN Sports Report is no more.
The original intent of JustIN Sports was to do sports stuff at you in a fair, apolitical way like the John Birch Society does, but then a bunch of hysterical femihippies got their Subarus in a knot and were all “WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS IS CRAZY THERE NEEDS TO BE A FREE SPORTS PRESS BLAH BLAH BLAH” and then they went and did abortions on each other at Lilith Fair. But guess what, dingbats! The original original intent was for the JustIN Sports Report to be a sports calendar. A calendar with, like, dates on it and whatnot. And with some of those dates having times of various sports contests that will be happening. Was that really so hard to understand?? Go hate America on your own time!
So chalk this up as a another victory for Our Transcendent Governor Mike Pence. He once again showed the hypocrisy and bed-wetting of the Marxist “drive-by” media by only literally rolling out the much-needed technological advancement of putting a Sports Calendar on a state internet web-site to provide times and dates of when sports stuff is happening, in real time.
This is Buck Hoosierman, signing off…
…and going to update the JustIN January Sports Calendar, just as I had planned. Because that is what this always was: a sports calendar. A calendar for people to check and see on what dates sportsmen are doing their sports. In real time.
~ PENCE FOR AMERICA IN ‘16 ~