Thanks to fans and foes

 

If one ever needed a reminder

that elections have consequences, look no further than the standoff between

Republicans and Democrats in our General Assembly last week. With just a few

more people voting Democratic in the last election, we might have avoided becoming

one of the nation's laughingstocks.

If people hadn't been too

busy to vote last November, our legislature wouldn't be as full as

mouth-breathing knuckle-draggers as it is, and we might not be in the mess in

which we currently find ourselves.

Emboldened by talk radio,

right-wing blogs and Fox News commentators, our legislators apparently want to

pass legislation negating nearly 100 years of progress in the law and drop us

back in the 1920s, when companies owned the fate of their employees and workers

had only the right to come to work or be fired.

If they effectively outlaw

unions, as state Republicans are proposing, our legislators could feel so

empowered that they might ban slacks for women next. It's impossible to know

where these zealots would stop if left unchecked.

Luckily for us, there's one

man standing in between us and these nutty Republicans, and that's our

wonderful Gov. Mitch Daniels. He's the only one who can turn off the fever for

radical change sweeping our legislature.

Don't get me wrong; Mitch is

no friend of the working man. He studied how to bust unions under Ronald Reagan

and how to bankrupt economies under George W. Bush. The working class people

protesting at the Statehouse since last week aren't his friends or a group he

even cares about.

But he's going to try to

squash this debate and get the legislature back to work because he's too busy

running for president that he doesn't want to focus on anything else.

In less than a year, he's

going to have to try to convince the voters of Iowa and New Hampshire that he's

not a crazy hillbilly who wants to destroy their jobs. So when the legislators

acted like crazy hillbillies and tried to destroy Hoosier jobs, Mitch needed to

step in and calm things down.

Any talk of outlawing unions

is going to have to wait until Mitch's presidential campaign is over. It also

means that going forward, possibly, things might not be as crazy as they seem

to be in the General Assembly.

Mitch is still a front-line

soldier in the Republican Party's plan to eliminate the middle class; but he

knows that timing is everything. Killing organized labor, outlawing abortion,

naming every street and building after Reagan -- all of that can wait, at least

another year.

Our governor's ambitions are

the only thing keeping us safe from turning into a third world economy. We need

to bolster his candidacy as long as we can, for he is the last hope we have.

Democratic legislators can't

live as refugees in the liberated territory of Illinois forever. Eventually,

they'll have to come home to feed their pets, mow their lawns and buy

groceries. Their actions in fleeing the state were courageous but remarkably

short-sighted.

That's why we need to support

our governor. As long as he thinks he has a chance in hell of becoming the

Republican nominee for president next year, he's going to keep the most rabid

Republicans in check.

Our trade unions need to

start distributing "Daniels for President" T-shirts to all their members.

People should start naming their children after him. We need to do whatever it

takes to boost Mitch's ego and keep the Republican legislature off our backs.

Destroying collective

bargaining is part of the grand scheme to eradicate the middle class and turn

our state's workers into zombies. The stakes are too high for us to allow this

to happen. And since keeping the ego of Daniels at a high level is the only

thing keeping us from destruction, boost his ego we must.

That means posting his

official portrait in all homes, churches and businesses. It may mean requiring

a copy of his collective speeches to be studied by our schoolchildren. It may

also mean commissioning phony polls showing him with high approval ratings in

Iowa.

Without any warning, the

Republicans in the Statehouse have declared war on all the state's working

families. Our jobs, our schools, our public safety -- they all hang in the

balance.

Only Mitch can save us now,

and that can happen only if he thinks he has a realistic chance of becoming

president.

So open up your wallets and

give to his campaign. Wear a Mitch button everywhere you go. Sure, he's in

favor of destroying prosperity as much as any Republican. But for now, he's the

only person keeping us safe from the Indiana Taliban.

"We love you, Mr. Governor!"

"Keep up the good work!" Practice these phrases. Right now, they're all we

have.

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