If one ever needed a reminder
that elections have consequences, look no further than the standoff between
Republicans and Democrats in our General Assembly last week. With just a few
more people voting Democratic in the last election, we might have avoided becoming
one of the nation's laughingstocks.
If people hadn't been too
busy to vote last November, our legislature wouldn't be as full as
mouth-breathing knuckle-draggers as it is, and we might not be in the mess in
which we currently find ourselves.
Emboldened by talk radio,
right-wing blogs and Fox News commentators, our legislators apparently want to
pass legislation negating nearly 100 years of progress in the law and drop us
back in the 1920s, when companies owned the fate of their employees and workers
had only the right to come to work or be fired.
If they effectively outlaw
unions, as state Republicans are proposing, our legislators could feel so
empowered that they might ban slacks for women next. It's impossible to know
where these zealots would stop if left unchecked.
Luckily for us, there's one
man standing in between us and these nutty Republicans, and that's our
wonderful Gov. Mitch Daniels. He's the only one who can turn off the fever for
radical change sweeping our legislature.
Don't get me wrong; Mitch is
no friend of the working man. He studied how to bust unions under Ronald Reagan
and how to bankrupt economies under George W. Bush. The working class people
protesting at the Statehouse since last week aren't his friends or a group he
even cares about.
But he's going to try to
squash this debate and get the legislature back to work because he's too busy
running for president that he doesn't want to focus on anything else.
In less than a year, he's
going to have to try to convince the voters of Iowa and New Hampshire that he's
not a crazy hillbilly who wants to destroy their jobs. So when the legislators
acted like crazy hillbillies and tried to destroy Hoosier jobs, Mitch needed to
step in and calm things down.
Any talk of outlawing unions
is going to have to wait until Mitch's presidential campaign is over. It also
means that going forward, possibly, things might not be as crazy as they seem
to be in the General Assembly.
Mitch is still a front-line
soldier in the Republican Party's plan to eliminate the middle class; but he
knows that timing is everything. Killing organized labor, outlawing abortion,
naming every street and building after Reagan -- all of that can wait, at least
Our governor's ambitions are
the only thing keeping us safe from turning into a third world economy. We need
to bolster his candidacy as long as we can, for he is the last hope we have.
Democratic legislators can't
live as refugees in the liberated territory of Illinois forever. Eventually,
they'll have to come home to feed their pets, mow their lawns and buy
groceries. Their actions in fleeing the state were courageous but remarkably
That's why we need to support
our governor. As long as he thinks he has a chance in hell of becoming the
Republican nominee for president next year, he's going to keep the most rabid
Republicans in check.
Our trade unions need to
start distributing "Daniels for President" T-shirts to all their members.
People should start naming their children after him. We need to do whatever it
takes to boost Mitch's ego and keep the Republican legislature off our backs.
bargaining is part of the grand scheme to eradicate the middle class and turn
our state's workers into zombies. The stakes are too high for us to allow this
to happen. And since keeping the ego of Daniels at a high level is the only
thing keeping us from destruction, boost his ego we must.
That means posting his
official portrait in all homes, churches and businesses. It may mean requiring
a copy of his collective speeches to be studied by our schoolchildren. It may
also mean commissioning phony polls showing him with high approval ratings in
Without any warning, the
Republicans in the Statehouse have declared war on all the state's working
families. Our jobs, our schools, our public safety -- they all hang in the
Only Mitch can save us now,
and that can happen only if he thinks he has a realistic chance of becoming
So open up your wallets and
give to his campaign. Wear a Mitch button everywhere you go. Sure, he's in
favor of destroying prosperity as much as any Republican. But for now, he's the
only person keeping us safe from the Indiana Taliban.
"We love you, Mr. Governor!"
"Keep up the good work!" Practice these phrases. Right now, they're all we