The ApocaDocs, Jim and Michael, present the Pre-Apocalypse News & Info Quiz (PANIQuiz) for the week beginning Monday, Feb. 21, to test your knowledge of current environmental news.
New Free Book, "Humoring the Horror of the Converging Emergencies"
This Week's PANIQuestions (Answers below):
1. Over the past 100 years, how many large predator fish in the ocean have been caught and consumed?
b. It evens out due to reproduction.
c. All of them.
d. All but the giant jellyfish.
2. Why are school officials nervous in South Chungcheong Province?
a. The students are exposed to danger due to making fireworks.
b. Indoor air pollutants have reached dangerous levels.
c. Livestock culled due to foot-and-mouth disease are buried nearby.
d. The graffiti has turned obscene.
e. Grade inflation is on the rise.
3. By how many days has the ragweed pollen season grown in Saskatoon in Canada?
a. The season has shrunk!
b. 12 days
c. 127 hours
d. 27 days
e. 17 days
4. According to the world's largest investment consultant, how big a shift in institutional asset allocation does climate change require today?
a. Forty percent.
b. Depends on whether you believe in reality or magic.
c. None of it you durn tree-hugger.
d. Twenty-five percent.
e. All of it you durn capitalist.
5. What did the governor of Maine say about the dangers of bisphenol-A?
a. "BPA stands for British Petroleum Assholes."
b. Worst case scenario, it might give women "little beards."
c. Worst case scenario, it will make for "some necessary population reductions."
d. There is no danger, "environmentalists are alarmists."
e. Shopping receipts "should be abolished."
6. How much is Amazon Deforestation up from last year?
a. 100 percent
b. 1000 percent
c. 50 percent
d. It's stayed the same.
e. 500 percent
7. What was discovered about invasive red fire ants in China, Australia, New Zealand, and elsewhere?
a. Their deep tunnels were becoming conduits for fracking chemicals.
b. They could be stuffed into straws and turned into sparklers.
c. Each nest had an individual "hive mind" that would soon join the Borg.
d. Nearly all could be traced back to fire ant populations in the southern US.
e. They were actually nanobots on reconnaissance.
8. According to U.S. government computer models what could spark global cooling?
a. A moratorium on computer models
b. Everyone empties their ice trays in their yards at the same moment.
c. A moratorium on burping
d. A moratorium on farting
e. Nuclear war