Manic Panic: Your enviro-PANIQuiz for the week


The ApocaDocs, Jim and Michael, present the Pre-Apocalypse News & Info Quiz (PANIQuiz) for the week beginning Monday, Jan 31, 2011, to test your knowledge of current environmental news.

Free Book, "Humoring the Horror of the Converging Emergencies"

This Week's PANIQuestions (Answers below):

1. What does a safety board suggest in its analysis of the San Bruno natural gas pipeline explosion?

a. It was a "once in a lifetime" event.

b. It was the result of "inhumane error."

c. Kids with matches are at fault.

d. There aree thousands of miles of pipelines at risk of failure.

e. It could have been prevented by proper feng shui.

2. What were the words on a Greenpeace-driven airship hovering above a meeting organized by the Koch brothers?

a. "Here comes the flood"

b. "Koch brothers are big dicks"

c. "Death to all ye who enter here"

d. "Koch brothers dirty money"

e. "Koch brothers are for lovers"

3. According to the US Census Bureau, how have carpooling habits changed in the past 30 years?

a. The percentage has stayed about the same.

b. No one does it anymore because other people stink.

c. Unknown, because people who carpool won't talk to the Census


d. The percentage has dropped by almost half.

e. The percentage has risen by half-again.

4. Why did the Canadian government abandon plans for a camp on the Arctic Ocean ice?

a. No local fast food joints.

b. Ravenous polar bears.

c. Can't see Russia from there.

d. Ice is too thin.

e. Eskimos say no-no.

5. What is the problem being faced by a scientist attempting to grow meat in a lab setting?

a. Local vegans

b. He lost his own left arm in the experiment, but won't say why.

c. Funding

d. People for the Ethical Treatment of Meat Grown in Test Tubes

e. It always tastes like chicken no matter what he does.

6. What do officials in Kandiyohi County in Minnesota think will be "biggest bombshell this county has ever seen"?

a. Zebra mussels

b. Zebra mussels with blonde wigs

c. The mixing of cloned and wild salmon.

d. Pesticide run-off in the streams and rivers.

e. Actual unexploded bombshells in a nearby landfill.

7. What's the latest twist in the 19 year old lawsuit attempting to hold Chevron accountable for oil contamination in Ecuador?

a. Chevron is using the RICO statute.

b. The organisms that ate the BP oil have been sent to Ecuador to

save the day!

c. Chevron is settling out of court.

d. Chevron CEO admitted blame then recanted.

e. Chevron hired Tony Hayward to handle public relations.

8. What was recently noted about the "once in a century" Amazon drought of 2005?

a. The Amazon drought of 2010 was much worse.

b. Biodiversity loves a vacuum.

c. It set the stage for the "once in a millennium" drought of 2010.

d. The emails of Amazongate make it clear that glaciers will not melt

in the Amazon.

e. Drought made the rainforest grow stronger.

9. Why is the wolverine uniquely at risk from climate change?

a. They smell so nasty when it's warm, their prey flee from them.

b. They like their roadkill refrigerated.

c. Spring snow pack is required for den-building and reproduction.

d. Adamantium claw strength depends on cold.

e. They won't be able to use their snowmobiles.

10. Asians accounted for what percent of the 207 million people affected by disasters in 2010?

a. Precisely half.

b. Practically none.

c. It depends on how you classify 'Asia'.

d. Eight-nine.

e. Before they migrated, or after?


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