The Playboy Channel recently announced the creation of a new game show, Boink That Bitch. The first episode will take place in Indianapolis.
“We wanted a city with a high libido but a closed-doors mentality,” said producer Anita Mann. “Indianapolis meets both criteria. This will allow for a good deal of creativity, as well as additional suspense.”
During the first round, two contestants are given a category. They must then compete to see who will “boink that bitch!” In the pilot episode, the two contestants, Mike Hunt and Cliff Taurus, drew the category “small” — they then named increasingly smaller places in which they could copulate.
“Cliff, I can boink that bitch in the observation deck of the Soldiers and Sailors Monument on Monument Circle.”
“Mike, I can boink that bitch in the bathroom at Skyline Chili.”
“Cliff, I can boink that bitch in the satellite dish at the TV station.”
“Mike, I can boink that bitch in a Yugo.”
“OK, Cliff, boink that bitch!”
Contestants are rewarded for creativity (Mike earned 50 points for his Monument suggestion) and the risk of getting caught (Cliff earned 20 points since the Yugo risk was judged to be moderate). Contestants are also rewarded on difficulty. (Cliff earned 30 points because, as Mann said, “It’s easier to have sex in a phone booth than a Yugo.”)
Contestants lose points for not being able to meet their challenge, an overused idea (Cliff lost 15 points for the fast food restaurant bathroom suggestion) and for getting caught (Cliff lost 30 points when someone wanted to use the Yugo as a decorative lawn ornament).