In what analysts are calling a swift and firm punitive implementation, IUPUI student and ROTC cadet Niles Fentwick was sentenced to 250 pushups last week for asking his adviser, Lt. Branch Gently, if he could make room in next fall"s schedule for professor Standbys ethics course. Gently, commenting on the incident, showed signs of pity: "Poor kid. He didn"t know what he was asking. But can you imagine? A course in ethics, at a time like this. Even the five-star generals don"t study that stuff - in PEACEtime!" When asked if she thought the punishment was extreme, military science professor and ROTC liaison Jennifer Earlymann replied with hesitation: "Maybe. But it sends an important message to young soldiers as well as the public, and that is that critical thinking has no place in military training. It would undermine the very fabric of modern warfare. Then where would we be?" Gently"s message was much more succinct: "Ethics is for pansies." Meanwhile, the office of Secretary of State Colin Powell, decorated general and Gulf War hero, responded to our request for his position on the controversial affair with a brief e-mail: "At this time, Secretary Powell prefers to withhold judgment on the incident."