Love, Unrequited

by Rocky the Diabolical Cat™ My friend the sassy Chicagoan Nena was down last weekend for a visit. We decided to stop by Bazbeaux for dinner before taking in a film at Key Cinemas.

While we munched on our appetizers, I said, "Nena, today is a very important day, an anniversary of sorts, you know."

"Anniversary? Of what? Your discovery of onanism?" she laughed.

"No, the anniversary of, ahem ... my unrequited love for you," I mumbled.

"Your unrequited love for me?" she responded incredulously.

"Yes, my unrequited love for you. Twenty years! Twenty years in the desert of loneliness, yet ever before me a mirage, a mirage that one day you, beautiful Nena, would return my affections!" I poeticized.

"Aw shit," she muttered. "First of all, I think you are mispronouncing 'unrequited'. You say it with a long 'i', but I've heard it said otherwise, like 'quit', that way, 'un-re-quit-ed'."

"I believe you are mistaken, my dear. I'll be back in a flash," I replied.

I jumped in Rocky's car, drove home, got his huge Webster's Second dictionary, returned to Bazbeaux, plopped the book on our table, and thumbed my way to the word in question.

"Aha!" I cried. "I was correct! It is pronounced with a long 'i'!"

A look of amusement materialized on her face.

"J, not matter how you pronounce it," she laughed, "your love for me remains unrequited!"

NUVO is happy to announce that due to the clever and valiant efforts of Ikey the Cat, Rocky the Diabolical CatTM was located yesterday and freed from the Bushist junta's clutches. Stay tuned for Rocky's two-part memoir of his harrowing experience, "The Floating Gulag."

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