Report: Al Qaida to Enter Car for 

Speaking by sat

Speaking by satellite telephone from the tribal areas of western Pakistan today, an al Qaida spokesman confirmed that the terrorist organization hopes to enter a car in the 2003 NASCAR campaign.
"It would be a good way to get our message across," the spokesman stated. Osama bin Laden is reputed to be a big NASCAR fan, receiving broadcasts of races in his secret hideout via a satellite TV hookup. "It is true that we are at war with the evil, infidel, whore-mongering, imperialist, Muslim-bashing, Palestinian-oppressing country of America, but we love a good race, too, you know," the spokesman said. "We enjoy all automobile racing but we especially love the bumper-to-the-bumper thrills of the NASCAR. So we will try to enter a car next season." NASCAR officials were unavailable for comment.

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