NEWS Commentary: 

Tunneling machine gone wild

Egor S. Grand From a pres

Tunneling machine gone wild

From a press release, last week: Mayor Peterson, DPW officials to launch tunneling machine that will reduce raw sewage overflows …

It seemed like a good idea on paper: Unleash a tunneling machine to redirect raw sewage away from schools and playgrounds. However, the “tunneling machine” concept was created by people who have never seen horror films.

The rest of us have, though, and it was no surprise to us when the tunneling machine only temporarily worked to specifications.

The rest, as we know, is history.

The tunneling machine, initially placed at the lower portion of Pogues Run, quickly ran amuck and wreaked havoc, the accounting of which has only begun: four downtown buildings, including our beloved Statehouse, leveled; the canal, perforated by the tunneling machine, now stands empty and dry; a city, terrified and shaken. And the solution? Bombing from above doubled or even tripled the damage.

Even now, so soon after the devastation, we can barely bring ourselves to ask: What were they thinking?

Someone should be held accountable, whether it’s the mayor or the entire Department of Public Works. An investigation should be held immediately — adjudicated by an outside prosecutor.

But first things first: The tunneling machine must be stopped. Before that, it must be found. At last sighting, the machine was headed toward Kentucky.

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Egor S Grand

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