NUVO has obtained

NUVO has obtained copies of Mayor Bart Peterson's real Blueprint to End Homelessness, a privately held plan that turns out to be quite different than what has been released to the public. Election-year criticism of the mayor has mounted as the homelessness agenda has languished, while other plans to use government revenue have moved swiftly ahead. An arrangement to help build a luxury downtown hotel has been reached, and progress has been reported on the city contributing money to build a new stadium for the Indianapolis Colts and high-end condominiums at the site of the former Market Square Arena. In a series of private meetings with campaign contributors, Peterson has devised a way to achieve those ambitious construction goals and eliminate homelessness at the same time. The Blueprint to End Homelessness is now part of an actual architectural blueprint, which calls for pouring homeless people into the foundation of the various high-cost building projects. NUVO has learned that the mayor privately refers to the plan as "perfect synergy." The proposal has been kept hush-hush while city officials seek a federal waiver of applicable genocide statutes. Reports are that the new Homeland Security agency will grant such a waiver on the grounds that homeless people are disproportionately less likely to state "under God" during the Pledge of Allegiance. Word of the plan has leaked to the local business community, which is thrilled by the out-of-town visitors that the unique idea could attract. "This plan is in perfect keeping with the city's historical treatment of its poor, and historical connections are always good for cultural tourism" says Circle City Downtown Inc. director Lillie Puchen-Gulliver. City officials shrug off the praise. "It's really just a modest proposal," says Peterson spokesperson Jon Swipht.

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