Haiku Year In Review 

INTERNATIONAL Bush and Blair are the Tweedledum and Tweedledee of our history after seeing

INTERNATIONAL Bush and Blair are the Tweedledum and Tweedledee of our history after seeing the tsunami news I need a gin and tectonic Kyrgystan protest centers around having too many consonants Afghans outraged by reports U.S. thinks Koran is squeezably soft Senate agrees to pick Bolton if job title will be "ambasshole" election results unclear: is it GerMany or GerWomany? Iran spews hatred playing right into Bush's Armageddon game NATIONAL President George Bush is administered the oath by Chief Darth Vader Schiavo case creates feeding tube flowing into GOP coffers Christian support for Bush second term includes those who speak in forked tongues thousands of lives too late panel finds that U.S. intelligence sucks DeLay believes that judicial branch has fallen too far from the tree stalled nomination, social security: Bush gets taste of lame duck conservative struck at Butler with liberal American pie I don't care if you do "support our troops" you still drive like an asshole Illinois will run own stem cell research leaving Bush blue in the face Rudolph sentenced to life playing in somebody else's reindeer games NRA cancels Columbus visit taking their Uzis straight home energy bill has created a brand new form of fuel: pork fat Boy Scouts consider instituting new Merit Badge for bad karma Indiana priest arrested for holding mass in public bathroom Pat Robertson's mouth one of the seven signs of the Apocalypse what New Orleans needs to clean after Katrina is the Big Squeegee only the Mother of all Mothers could cut short Bush's vacation Katrina: noun used to describe something worse than initially thought FEMA: Federal Exercise in Making sure friends are Advantaged Sandy Berger fined fifty thou for acting like Winona Ryder Rita arrives in a tizzy; battle of the diva hurricanes DeLay indicted on a felony charge as the Hammer is nailed only way to count sum of GOP scandals is with fuzzy math overestimate of storm evacuees leaves the Red Cross red faced senators declare yes to Arctic Drilling, screw you to caribou five count indictment suggests that Scooter may have ad-libbyed too much Hurricane Wilma knocks Florida all the way back to the Stone Age Kansas wins design battle while in Dover they're caught chasing their tails SCIENCE discovery of bird thought to be extinct gives watchers a woody Swedish researchers discover gays are guided by their fairymones researchers find one gene shifts sex preference and makes fruit flies fruity scientists in South Korea clone dog making a Rin Tin Tin Tin two-thirds polled believe Santa Claus is pregnant with the Easter Bunny an inhaled form of insulin by Pfizer gives Eli Lilly pfits the intelligent design advocates are just pandering pandas research shows Arctic ice cap is shrinking to size of a yamika can we send the rains of the northeast to the fires of California? three foot tall remains raise questions about ancient species of Mini-mes BUSINESS Guidant failure to disclose defibrillator flaw does seem heartless Ebbers gets twenty five years as yet another tycoon faces doom Sony BMG clears payola suit with me this haiku is free Adidas absorbs Reebok, turning biz into a really big shoe the Vioxx jury awards victim's wife, wiping the smirk off of Merck Dennis Kozlowski is sentenced to pissing gin for fellow inmates EEOC files lawsuit against Fox News for trashing the henhouse Guidant sues Johnson & Johnson Corporation for breaking its heart ENTERTAINMENT proposed spending cuts at PBS may require that Big Bird be plucked Pistons pummel poor Pacers whose poise persisted post-Palace pickle runaway bride checks herself in because she's a girl interrupted Pitt, Aniston split cite irreconcilable similarities Palmeiro: a noun used to describe a giant, public-level lie like any rapper Martha's prison stint will bring instant foyer cred Britney Spears' bra nets 15 thou in auction think what her thong would get MEMORIAL Sontag, lover of metaphor, finds her demise stunningly concrete actor and singer Jerry Orbach obeys the only law that counts Death of a Tales-man playwright Arthur Miller is dead at 89 like Mother T and Lady Di in one week pass Pope and Terry Schiavo

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Jim Poyser

Jim Poyser

Jim Poyser is Executive Director of Earth Charter Indiana, a statewide organization that was one of over two dozen nonprofit partners in Greening the Statehouse. A former managing editor of NUVO, he won HEC’s Environmentalist of the Year Award in 2013.

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