Why change our clocks?

The brilliant politicians in Indiana are at it again, trying to force Daylight Savings Time on us whether we want it or not.

We have a gigantic deficit, criminals in the license branch system, massive property taxes and increasing poverty in Indiana. But the lawmakers think they need to spend valuable time deciding what time it is.

Even Gov. Kernan and his opponent, Mitch “Mr. Deficit” Daniels, have come out in favor of adopting DST, perhaps because talking about it diverts attention from the fact neither has any other new ideas for the state.

Nobody has ever satisfactorily explained why we need to change our clocks twice a year. Is it because everyone else does it? Is it because the sun will shine longer if we change? Will businesses flock to the state now?

This is nothing new. I’ve been hearing arguments for DST ever since I was a kid. People in other states get confused about the time in Indiana. We get to enjoy more outdoor activities in the summer. Cows can’t give milk unless we change our clocks.

It is true that explaining the time zones in Indiana to out-of-staters takes a few seconds. I’ve seen this firsthand while dealing with publicists from around the country.

But there’s a simple solution to that problem. When people ask me what time zone we’re in, I tell them that we’re Eastern in the winter and Central in the summer. It takes them about 20 seconds to write that down on their Rolodex card, and then we’re in business.

Changing our watches, clocks, computers and VCRs twice a year would be a nuisance as well. Why go through all of this when there’s no compelling reason to do so?

The debate over DST is just another way for politicians to avoid doing anything about real problems, so tell them to STFU and get back to the real business of the people.

But since we’re in an election year, any real discussion of the issues is going to be difficult. Last week, for example, Matt Drudge broke out his siren graphic and used even more exclamation points than usual to talk about an alleged John Kerry sex scandal.

Apparently, Kerry was having an affair with a young woman and Drudge doesn’t approve of it one bit. He sees this as a reason to disqualify Kerry from the presidency.

I don’t care whether Kerry was banging some broad or not. I don’t want to hear about his sex life any more than he wants to hear about mine. Even George W. Bush has a right to a private life. If he wants to bring strippers into the White House, fine with me.

So far, at least, the Kerry sex story doesn’t seem to have much staying power as a scandal. Even though Drudge is posting new information every day, and despite the fact that the British press keeps harping on it, most people don’t seem to care.

To me, the much bigger scandal here is that George Bush spent hundreds of thousands of my tax dollars last weekend to campaign at the Daytona 500.
There I was, sitting at home sipping on a drink and getting ready to enjoy the race, when G.W. pops up on my TV screen, ranting about NASCAR fans being true patriots and how impressive the racetrack is and how wonderful the armed forces are.

I watch sports because it’s the one place I can go to not hear about politics. I don’t want to hear Jermaine O’Neal’s views on NAFTA and I shouldn’t have to hear Bush’s views on NASCAR or the NFL.

Bush doesn’t really care about the sport or its fans; he just wants their votes, obviously. After he gets re-elected, he can go back to working to get these peoples’ jobs outsourced to India.

Our economy is shedding jobs at an alarming rate, our treasury has been bled dry and our soldiers are involved in dangerous and unwinnable situations across the world.

Yet our president seems to think he can take time away from all of those things and hang out at the racetrack all day. Say what you want about President Clinton, he at least had his entertainment delivered straight to his office. When he was finished with his pleasure, he got back to work for the American people.
Do we want a president who cheats on his wife for 15 minutes at a time or do we want one who wastes entire days at sporting events? Do we want a president who lies about sex or do we want one who lies about wars?

More than ever, it’s going to be important this year for people to register and vote. The system is set up to discourage average people from voting. If we’re not careful, we could get a repeat of 2000, when the person with the most votes lost the election.

You can download a registration form at http://www.in.gov/sos/elections/vote_reg.html. All you have to do is print it out and mail it in. You can also register to vote at license branches.

Just because they stole it from us last time doesn’t mean we should give it to them this time. Politicians don’t want poor or middle-class people to vote. Give them the finger and vote this November.