Sports & Rec

Monday, April 30, 2012

Off Base: Giant-thumb sucking; draft dupe

Posted By on Mon, Apr 30, 2012 at 4:00 PM

5. There's no crying in baseball

Going home with a ball from a baseball game is a happy moment. For this Rangers fan, seeing the adults next to him take pictures with the souvenir was tragic. Fortunately, the tyke was tossed a ball from the Rangers' dugout a few minutes later. All is good in the world.

4.Draft prank

Rutgers football player Mohamed Sanu's dream is to play in the NFL. During last weekend's NFL Draft, a prankster called Sanu and told the receiver his dream has come true. The Cincinnati Bengals were going to select him with the 27th overall pick. Sanu's agent tweeted the great news, everyone hugged it out and then the Bengals didn't select him. It was all a hoax. Fortunately, the Bengals (for real this time) drafted Sanu in the third round.

Sanu told ESPN, "My agent said it was some kid playing a prank. The kid said he was very sorry, he didn't mean anything by it."

3. A gentle dawg

UGA defensive tackle John Jenkins

Georgia Bulldog defensive tackle John Jenkins is surely sporting a wrinkled thumb at this point in his nap. Let lying dawgs sleep.

2. No World Peace

If you even slightly pay attention to Indiana sports, you certainly remember former Pacers' forward Ron Artest losing his mind, running into the stands and fighting whoever was willing. Now, Artest has changed his name to Metta World Peace and plays for the Lakers. James Harden's head doesn't feel the difference between the hot-headed Artest and the self-proclaimed improved Peace.

1. Call me Mr. Relevant

Mr. Irrelevant is the nickname given to the last player picked in the NFL draft. The Indianapolis Colts had this year's honor of selecting 253rd, and they chose Chandler Harnish, former Northern Illinois quarterback. Hope he's prepared for all the NFL and this lady have in store for him.

Author's note: I want to thank any and all of you (mom!) who read my weekly posts about odd happenings in the sports world during my internship. It's been fun to share some of sports' unique and goofy stories. In my opinion, sports are and will always be true reality television. Now that my internship with NUVO is over, I'm continuing Off Base here.

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Monday, April 23, 2012

Off Base: Bathroom break & broken trophy

Posted By on Mon, Apr 23, 2012 at 10:20 AM

5. Shattered glass

The Waterford Crystal Coaches' Trophy is was valued at $30,000 and is customized for each college-football national champion. The coveted memento is now in thousands of tiny pieces after a parent of an Alabama football player tripped and knocked the gorgeous relic to its shattered fate. The process of replacing the trophy is in the works.

4. When nature calls, you listen

Even if it means delaying a televised Major League Baseball game. Atlanta Braves' center fielder, Michael Bourn, is seen in this video rushing to buckle his belt as his team, the broadcasters and thousands of fans in the stands wait for him to take the field.

3. Silent but deadly

A Miami Heat player is to blame. But, who?

2. Hurts just watching

This is unfortunate. Umpire Greg Gibson took a fastball directly where the sun don't shine. He called the remainder of the game in falsetto.

1. Young boy and a drag queen

No, it's not a "walk into the bar together" joke. A man in a blue dress, wearing a flowing blond wig, pranced around the rugby field during a recent match. Once it was obvious she is actually a he, one of the burly players lowered his shoulder and took the streaker down.

No dress or wig here; just a little boy running around the field at a White Sox game last Thursday.

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Monday, April 16, 2012

Off Base: Hall of Fame drag; off with the lingerie

Posted By on Mon, Apr 16, 2012 at 1:30 PM

5. One-man effort

Cheerleading is typically a woman's domain. And they are pretty damn great at it. But one man, Sacha Heppell, attempted to change all this by becoming the first male cheerleader in Denver Broncos' history. According to the Denver Broncos cheerleading department states anyone, female or male, can try out for the squad. Despite his best cheerful efforts, Heppell did not make the cut.

This is not Sacha Heppell, but it is a man, his dreams and a great attitude.

4. A-Rod is such a drag (queen)

Alex Rodriguez on the beach

If it's up to the producers of the upcoming indie movie about Salvador Dali, The Surrealist, MLB all-star Alex Rodriguez will be discarding his uniform in exchange for a beautiful dress. A-Rod has been approached to play a "stunning, leggy drag queen" as Dali's "factotum social secretary," Potassa.

3. Caddie pokes gator

During the RBC Heritage golf tournament last week, an alligator gave a new meaning to the phrase 'stay away from the hazard.' Just off the green on the par-5, 15th hole, Brian Gay was preparing his next shot when the gator decided to sunbathe near his ball. Gay's caddie Kip Henley poked at the gator with a sand-trap rake until it scurried off into the pond.

2. Less lingerie

Lingerie Football League

Maybe it's just a reason for me to 'research' the Lingerie Football League, but there is sad news to report. The beautiful, busty, hard-hitting athletes of the LFL will be sitting out the 2012 season to expand the sport worldwide and re-focus it as a warm-weather game. Plans are to strap on the garters once again in April 2013.

1. Miss-spelled words


John Calipari and his Kentucky Wildcats basketball team won the 2012 National Championship. The team and coach Calipari are receiving well-deserved congratulatory handshakes and accolades. Unfortunately, the kind folks of Pikeville, Ky. granted Calipari a plaque with a couple spelling errors.

Can you spot them?

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Monday, April 9, 2012

Off Base: Forced regurgitation and lies

Posted By on Mon, Apr 9, 2012 at 1:45 PM

5. Dog consumes coveted credential

The Masters tournament is the first golf major of the year and features arguably the most beautiful scenery in sports. The prestigious course in Augusta, Ga. is home to the coveted green jacket, which the winner proudly dons.

Sierra, the ticket eating pooch
  • Sierra, the ticket-eating pooch

Tickets to the event are extremely hard to come by, and once you have them, you protect them - a lesson Seattle resident Russ Berkman found out the up-chuck kinda way. Berkman's Swiss Mountain Dog ate four tickets his master had for a practice round at the 2012 Masters. After a little research, Berkman learned that feeding the pooch hydrogen peroxide was a safe way to make the pooch puke up the tickets.

A digested Masters ticket
  • A not-quite-digested Masters ticket

4. Boat-race buffoonery

One of England's most historic racing events, The Boat Race (clever name, eh?) was interrupted by a wetsuit-wearing protestor, colliding crews and a collapsed Oxford bow man. Trenton Oldfield, the protestor, jumped in the middle of the River Thames as Cambridge and Oxford were digging their oars rigorously through the water. He narrowly escaped being struck by an oar and was quickly arrested. Once the race resumed, the two crews collided which caused the loss of an oar for Oxford. To top it off, Oxford bow man Dr. Alexander Woods suddenly collapsed. All said, an unusual ménage a trois of events which led to the Oxford crew's appeal of the race.

3. Basketball team runs football alley-oop

A high school basketball all-star game began in a very unusual way. After winning the opening tip-off, the white team lined up in the familiar football formation, but on the unfamiliar hard court.

2. Bobby's world

Bobby Petrino, head football coach of the Arkansas Razorbacks, recently crashed his motorcycle but failed to reveal he had a female companion--who was not his wife--riding with him.

Jessica Dorrell
  • Jessica Dorrell
The father of four has admitted to a relationship with a 25-year-old who was hired on the football staff March 28.The young female riding on the back of Petrino's chopper was Jessica Dorrell, a former Razorback volleyball player. Making things more interestingly sad for all involved, she's engaged to another Arkansas athletics department employee. Petrino has since been placed on paid leave by the university.

1. Awkward interview

Long story short: Dwight Howard is a superstar in the NBA. He allegedly requested his head coach Stan Van Gundy to be fired. This interview is being called one of the strangest moments ever in sports, as evidenced by Van Gundy's nervous Diet Pepsi sipping.

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Monday, April 2, 2012

Off Base: Wife swap for tickets; father tossing

Posted By on Mon, Apr 2, 2012 at 11:45 AM

5. Bulging what?!?

Amare Stoudamire has a bulging disk in his back that will keep him off the court for the rest of the season. Easy for me to say (type). Not so easy for a few broadcasters, who proclaimed Stoudamire has a "bulging dic#."

4. Dueling dialysis

University of Kentucky and University of Louisville are vicious college basketball rivals. They don't mess around. Not even while on dialysis. One UK fan and one L'ville fan got into fisticuffs while hooked up to dialysis machines.

The teams met in the Final Four this past weekend, with UK victorious. Then for some reason the victors' fans decided to destroy stuff:

3. Man offers wife in exchange for tickets

This is his unusual post from Craigslist:

"I am a UK fan wanting to go to the Final Four in N'Oleans. I have put up my wife as collateral. She can make you speak 5 languages you never knew you could speak. I am not feeling my best so I have to use my sexy mama to get me to the game. She is completely game, is a litte (sic) picky, but if you make her howl at the moon while making her speak portugese (sic) or something I don't get out of her then by all means.....have at it and let me see my UK Wildcats!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes it is bad to do this, but it (sic) the Kentucky faithful dammit. Look out for the Bluegrass State and hook this pimp up okay?"

2. Player removes his biggest fan

Bernard Tomic is a professional tennis player. His coach - and father - was really bothering him during a recent match. The younger Tomic requested the chair umpire remove the elder Tomic from the arena.

Tomic was heard in an exchange with the chair umpire: "He's annoying - I know he's my father - but he's annoying me. I want him to leave, but how's that possible?"

The good stuff starts at 1:40.

1. Sports tomfoolery

ESPN had some fun with one of their TV stars this April Fool's Day.

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Monday, March 26, 2012

Off Base: Lingerie knockout; brave ski jump

Posted By on Mon, Mar 26, 2012 at 11:40 AM

5. Great-great paragliding grandma

Mary Allen Hardison wouldn't be out-done by her 75-year-old paragliding son. The 101-year-old courageous great-great grandmother set a Guinness World Record by becoming the oldest woman to tandem paraglide when she took flight in Salt Lake City. "Just because you are old doesn't mean you have to sit on your duff all day," Hardison told Reuters.

4. Samuel L. Jackson vs. Will Ferrell

Will Ferrell was hilarious when he tackled the PA duties at a Bulls-Hornets game. Samuel L. Jackson took on the challenge recently at the Clippers-Hornets game. Jackson isn't quite as funny as Ferrell, but he does bring out a little Jules Winnfield. And that's classic.

3. Twice as nice

Brittney Griner is a 6'8 Baylor basketball beast. Griner became the second women's college basketball player ever to dunk during the NCAA Tournament. Her first dunk shows her power, the second her pure athleticism.

This guy is Baylor's biggest fan.

2. "Bulldozed" by lingerie

Mitchell Mortaza Twitter
Lingerie Football League

Lingerie League Football Commissioner Mitchell Mortaza suffered a concussion. Mortaza's injury was the result of one skimpily-clad league hopeful knocking him on his back and slamming the back of his head on the green turf. There are worse ways.

1. "I can do this!"

10-year-old talks herself into her first ever ski jump...and it is adorable. What fear are you going to conquer today?

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Thursday, March 22, 2012

Video: Flying like a bird

Posted By on Thu, Mar 22, 2012 at 10:00 AM

We can't get enough videos of people doing ridiculous things, like trying to fly in something other than an airplane or helicopter.

This time: Is Jarno Smeets' flying machine a torture or freedom device?

Via Kat via The Hairpin via Human Birdwings

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Post-Peyton: 5 heart-breaking sports icons

Posted By on Thu, Mar 22, 2012 at 6:00 AM

In case you've been living under a rock, let us fill you in: The unthinkable happened...Peyton Manning signed with another NFL team. Our beloved QB went from the beautiful white-and-blue Colts to the unfamiliar orange-and-blue Broncos. As Indianapolis mourns, take solace in knowing he is not the only superstar to don a new uniform and break fans' hearts.

5. Michael Jordan. The greatest-ever retired, returned and unfortunately played for the Washington Wizards.

4. Joe Namath. "Broadway Joe" was king of New York City. "Joe Willie" ended his career with the Los Angeles Rams.

3. Albert Pujols: The St. Louis Cardinals won the World Series last year. Then Pujols left the Cardinals for the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim - and $254 million.

2. Brett Favre: Sure, he was drafted by the Atlanta Falcons. But he became an icon in Green Bay. Favre left his loyal "cheese heads" for the bright lights of New York, then for the rival Minnesota Vikings.

1. Babe Ruth: Arguably the greatest baseball player ever, "the Sultan of Swat" won four World Series Titles with the New York Yankees. But he fizzled out with the Boston Braves.

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Monday, March 19, 2012

Off Base: Cleavage, dentures and theft

Posted By on Mon, Mar 19, 2012 at 4:22 PM

Cleavage and Chess

5. Chesty chess

Cleavage has been put in checkmate. The European Chess Union recently implemented a rule for women and their barely there tops at the European Women's Championship. No more than two buttons can be undone, and skirts cannot be more that 3.9 inches above the knees.

4. Pearly (fake) whites

In last week's "Off Base" I mentioned there were bound to be unforgettable March Madness moments. I was referring to the grit-your-teeth intense play on the court. Didn't think the talk of the tournament would be about the "March Madness Dentures Guy."

3. Superstar airballs

Blake Griffin jumps over cars and really, really tall people.

Blake Griffin is arguably the best athlete in the NBA. Blake Griffin didn't even hit the rim on back-to-back free throws. Oh, the humanity.

2. Thoughts and prayers

At times we're reminded that sports is not life and death. A 23-year-old professional footballer suddenly collapsed mid-match last Saturday. Fabrice Muamba was taken to the hospital and the latest update is that he's in critical condition.

1. Superfan swipes cell

Ashley Judd is an accomplished actress and Kentucky Wildcats' basketball fanatic. With her celebrity status, she's able to gain post-game access to the locker room. Usually her visits involve high-fives and smiles. This visit was involved thievery of 6'9" sophomore Terrence Jone's cell phone. Judd accidentally picked up the player's phone and left town. She felt so bad about it she immediately returned it along with a handwritten note.

Terrence Jones tweet

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Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Video: Flying man slams into mountain

Posted By on Tue, Feb 28, 2012 at 8:55 AM

Airplanes, birds, wedding garters and UFOs: All fly with ease. Humans aren't meant to, but we've all had the fantasy that we could soar over morning traffic jams to get to work on time.

Jeb Corliss doesn't fantasize - he flies. Corliss has spent his entire adult life zooming through the sky at over 100 mph as a "flying squirrel."

The views are absolutely breathtaking. But you know what else is? When you get a little too close and make contact with those beautiful mountains. Unfortunately, the bird man slammed his lower body into South African Table Mountain at over 120 mph:

Despite suffering two broken legs, Corliss was able to deploy his parachute and land.

Corliss is alive and recovering after five weeks in the hospital, and he vows to continue flying for the rest of his life. "The only reason I'm getting better is so that I can jump again," Corliss said. "That's what I do. There's absolutely nothing in this world that's going to stop me from jumping."

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Monday, February 27, 2012

Off Base: Rants, loose stool and makeup

Posted By on Mon, Feb 27, 2012 at 10:00 AM

5. Family tradition

Bobby Knight is an all-time-great head coach. Knight is also known for his mini rants and raves at Indiana University. Bob Knight does not disappoint in the video. Check your speaker volume before playing this classic rant:

The rage doesn't fall far from the Knight family tree. Pat Knight, son of Bobby and head basketball coach of Lamar University, carried on the family tradition by interrupting the postgame news conference with harsh criticisms and jabs. No Lamar player was safe from Pat's poisonous pokes.

4. Linspired ice cream

Jeremy Lin flavored ice cream thanks to Ben and Jerry's

Jeremy Lin has taken the sports world by storm. The New York Knicks point guard has become a national icon over the past three weeks. And now, thanks to Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream, all of us can have a taste of Lin-sanity. Ben & Jerry's "Taste the Lin-Sanity" ice cream is a mix of vanilla yogurt with honey swirls and chunks of fortune cookies.

Ben and Jerry's apologized to those offended by the initial inclusion of fortune cookies and replaced them with waffle cone pieces.

3. Loose stool

Announcers James Bates and Steve Wolf were high with excitement for the Xavier-Dayton tip-off, but it didn't take long for Bates to come crashing down:

2. Courtside collision

Unlike James Bates, the chair was not the problem for ESPN announcer Jimmy Dykes. Sitting courtside as a play-by-play announcer seems awesome, with its great vantage point for watching great athletes. But what's not so great is when those athletes can't slow their hustle. And Alabama freshman guard Levi Randolph could not slow his hustle:

1. Real men wear makeup

A Lakers radio play-by-play guy was caught with his hand in the foundation jar. John Ireland is seen applying layer after layer of makeup to his rosie cheeks before realizing he was in the background of a live shot. The look on his freshly powdered face when he realizes he's on camera is priceless; Jay Leno adds some commentary in this video:

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Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Off Base: Funny Ferrell, Ocho5, Lin-sanity

Posted By on Wed, Feb 15, 2012 at 9:45 AM

5. A-lister annunciates

Will Ferrell introduced the players at the Feb. 8 Bulls-Hornets game. Now there is a page on Facebook calling for Ferrell to announce the ballers during this NBA All-Star game.

4. Chad Ocho-Johnson

Chad Ochocinco, once famed Bengals receiver, chronic trash talker and reality TV star, is changing his last name...again. "Ocho" is going back to his birth-name "Johnson." He is engaged and doesn't want his future wife to sport Ochocinco as her married name.

3. Super Houston

Whitney Houston

In case you've been living under a rock: Whitney Houston passed away last Saturday night. Her Star-Spangled Banner performance at Super Bowl XXV is being called the best ever.

2. Famous Ball State grad accused

Fox Sports' Jason Whitlock is being called racist after an insensitive tweet about New York Knicks guard Jeremy Lin.

Jason Whitlock Twitter
Lin is one of the few Asian Americans in the NBA. Whitlock played football at Warren Central High School and graduated from Ball State in 1990. The controversial personality, who hosts a podcast entitled "Real Talk," has since apologized after pressure from the Asian American Journalists Association.

1.Jeremy Lin-mazing

Jeremy Lin is incredible. Lin has scored more points in his first five NBA starts than any other player since the ABA-NBA merger..oh, and he hit the game winning shot in Tuesday night's match against the Toronto Raptors. You can call him Lin-derella.

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