Friday, May 6, 2016

Savage Love: Butt wait ...

"A strategically deployed butt plug sounds like an excellent solution to the problem."

Posted By on Fri, May 6, 2016 at 12:01 PM


I’ve been with my boyfriend for more than a year. He’s the first person I’ve had sex with. Four times now while we were having passionate sex, he has slipped out of my vagina and accidentally penetrated me anally. That shit hurts, and I can’t help but cry. I know he feels super guilty each time. I love sex, but I’m kind of scared every time we have it now. We’ve engaged in a little anal play before, and I wasn’t really a fan. But I’m not adverse to the idea of using a butt plug. Do you think this would work? Surely other people have this problem too, right?

Wrong Hole, Anal Torment

My own personal sexperience with anal led me to doubt claims of accidental anal penetration, WHAT, as anal penetration always required focus, precision, and proper breathing techniques — in my own sexperience. But listeners of the Savage Lovecast schooled me in Episode 340, and I’m now convinced that accidental anal penetration is something too many women have experienced. 

A strategically deployed butt plug sounds like an excellent solution to the problem, WHAT, but get yourself a plug with a wider-than-usual base to prevent your boyfriend’s misdirected cock from pushing the plug, base and all, all the way in you (ouch) or his misdirected cock from sliding in alongside the plug. (If you hate single penetration, you’ll really hate double penetration.)

If the problem persists even with a plug — if your boyfriend’s cock is constantly slamming into the plug in a way that you find uncomfortable —a thumbtack glued to the base of the plug will inspire your boyfriend to be more focused and precise.

And speaking of the Savage Lovecast, we’re coming up on our 500th episode, which is a significant milestone for this relatively new genre/platform/doohickey. If you’re not already listening, find it here: And a big thanks to Nancy Hartunian, the Lovecast’s producer since Episode 1, and to the tech-savvy, at-risk youth who pushed me to start podcasting before it was cool.
@fakedansavage on Twitter

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Dan Savage

Dan Savage

In addition to being a nationally syndicated sex advice columnist and author of books, Savage can also lay claim to being the only person at his home paper to have actually converted his sexuality into a profession. He has a boyfriend and a child. He is also wealthy beyond the dreams of avarice and cheats at racketball... more
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